Knowing the Who, What, and Why of Your Preteen Min…

Knowing the Who, What, and Why of Your Preteen Ministry

Over the next three days, I will be leading some workshops about preteen ministry at a ministry conference. One of the areas that I will touch on is having a vision for preteen ministry.

I would like to hear about the vision that you have for your preteen ministry. Let me know why your preteen ministry exist – I bet most of us will have similar visions!

Joe

So I took a jump – this is a really big jump. I ha…

So I took a jump – this is a really big jump. I have been dreaming of doing something like this for about 5 years now. It is a really big jump for me, because I am not that computer and website savvy. I have decided to create a website that will serve two purposes or more (?). One is to serve as a ParentConnect Page for our preteen ministry. The other is to serve as a very indepth resource site for people who ministry to preteens.There is not a whole lot on there now, but hopefully there will be soon. If you have any ideas or resources that you know of or are using, please let me know at the e-mail on the website. Thanks…

The website is www.preteenedge.com

Joe

“Loose lips sink ships” -Vs- “The lips of the righ…

“Loose lips sink ships” -Vs- “The lips of the righteous nourish many”

There is an old saying from one of the past great wars that went something like this, “Loose lips sink ships.” Essentially what they were saying is that careless words can cost the lives of people, so we need to use our words with caution. This is also true with those of us who work with children and youth, both figuratively and literally. I like to say that the words we use can either bring about life, or they can bring about death. We never know what effect the words we use have on people, especially on the children that we minister too.

I was confronted with this fact one Sunday morning. A former student from my ministry wrote me a card, thanking me for all the kind and encouraging words that I passed her way whenever she was in and around our ministry. She said that whenever she came to church or our preteen ministry events, everyone always spoke kindly to her and used words of love, acceptance, and encouragement towards her – she said that she always felt closer to God when she was around us. You see, Summer does not have a good home life, in fact the few times that I had gone to her home, I could hear the harsh words and tones that she experienced. At home, she never heard words that would bring life to her soul, instead she heard words that crushed her spirit and made her feel insignificant and unwanted; in a sense they brought her death. However, when Summer came around our preteen ministry staff, she heard words that nourished her soul and uplifted her spirit. She came to know that God loves her and created her with significance and purpose – God’s word brought her life!

There was another lesson to be had that day. That Sunday evening as my family and I were winding down from another busy Sunday, I walked into my youngest daughter’s bedroom and I observed that her room was a mess and not just any ordinary mess. It was the type of mess that only an eight-year-old girl, who is full of life and wonder, can create. As she sat there in a pile of crumbled-up pieces of paper, dutifully working on another masterpiece – I told her in a stern voice that her room was a pigsty and that pigs only live in them. She looked up at me with crocodile tears forming in her eyes and on her cheeks and she said to me through sobs, “Daddy, if I’m a pig, does this mean that you do not love me anymore.” My heart stopped and I grabbed her in my arms and told her that I was wrong for saying those words to her and that I loved her. That day I learned all to well that “Loose lip can sink ships” and “The lips of the righteous nourish many.”

Rated G – No Way! Okay, here is the situation. Ye…

Rated G – No Way!

Okay, here is the situation. Yesterday, in one our 5th grade boy’s Sunday school class, we always have “What’s the latest” discussion time at the beginning of class. Well for most of the fourteen 5th grade boys in room 5B, the latest was the movie “CARS”. Several of the boys were excited about the movie and some of the boys said they hated it. Well I did care for a couple of the boys attitude when they said that, so I went on an investigative search of why they didn’t like the movie CARS. After several questions, what I found out was that the boys who said they hated it, DIDN’T EVEN SEE THE MOVIE! The only reason why they did not like it, was because the movie was rated G and G ratings to these boys are not cool. However, when asked by their fearless preteen minister (me) if they liked such and such movie, the sais they did and that it was awesome and one of their favorite movies, until I reveiled it to them that it was rated G as well. Hmm, sometimes I can be a stinker because I used that moment as a teaching moment on “be slow to speak and quick to listen.”

It seems coolness and peer presure are getting younger and younger!

Joe

PART 3 THE END Okay, okay here it is! We have be…

PART 3 THE END

Okay, okay here it is! We have been conducting an Education Forum at the church I am on staff at, which included a few hand-pick staff members, whose job it was to rethink education churchwide. CCO is a decent size church (about 2300 people), so paradigms have shifted. Everything was on the chopping block, so to speak, and I mean everything! We were forced to take this measure, because even though we are in a somewhat rural setting, cultural has drastically changed. Even though culture is not as fast paced as it is in California (I am from the San Fransico Bay area, CA. I moved to southwest Missouri 5 years ago), it has become very rushed and busy, especially for families. Therefore, causing church events and programming to conflict or add to the other activities our families are involved in. Something has to change! We as a church want to build bridges to our community, but instead of wanting the community to cross over to us, we want to cross over to our community. In other words, we want our families to influence their neighbors, friends, and family members for Christ, by going into the community they are already involved in; whether it be at Little league practice, afterschool programs, soccer practice, etc… We can no longer expect people to pick our church activities over the other activities in their lives. They just aren’t doing it! We are forced to simplify and narrow our focus!

I tell you all this to serve as a backdrop for the changes that are going to take place in our preteen ministry.

EVENTS
Preteens by nature are social cats (I hate cats, but love preteens). Most of my preteen ministry budget dollars are invested in the events category. We do alot of events for them, such as a fall retreat, a summer preteen road trip, Superstart, Believe, camp, and the list could go on. All of these events are very purposeful and have been successful, drawing large crowds and have brought about life change for some of our preteens. However, we don’t need to do all of these events – So I am cutting some of the events out and redoing a couple of the others. In all we will do a total of four event, not including camp or our large summer outreach event (we do not do VBS). With this narrowed focus, we hope to be able to make the events that we do, more excellent and effective.

SUNDAYS
Are made for worship (haha)! Anyways, we did have programming for all three services. We did a computer lab during the first service, we did a more traditional Sunday school format the second hour, and then we had a preteen worship hour at our third hour service. Here is what we are doing and (already do in our preteen worship hour, during third service): We are going to no longer offer anything for preteens during the first hour (This means no more computer lab… Reasons why, will be discussed in another blog). We are moving in the direction of having two preteen worship services – one will be during the second hour (No more traditional Sunday school… Hate me all you want) and third hour services. Here is what they look like:

Each hour is sliced into four blocks:
The Hangout time 15 minutes- Students and leaders come into The Edge and hangout, playing foosball, air hockey, Game cubes, and catch up on what’s been going in their lives.

The Connection time 15-20 minutes – Worship time (We use a live band). This is when preteens will here announcements, focus on the music aspect of worship, drama skits, video clips, and etc…

The Point time 10-15 minutes - This is the teaching time. A 10 to 15 minute sermon will introduce the point that we want our preteens to learn that week.

The So What time 15-20 minutes – This is small group time. This is where preteens will be divided by grade and gender to discuss the teaching point and how it applies to their world, but they will build community with each other, by talking about life in general and share what is going on in their lives with their small group friends and adult leaders.

The rest of the remaining time is hangout and wait for parent pick-up or released to meet parents.

For the sake of room, I will talk about Wednesday night programming in another blog. What I gave here, is programming and formating. I will also be blogging about philosophy, curriculum and reasons why we are doing things this way, later on.

Joe

PART 2 In response to the question asked in the p…

PART 2

In response to the question asked in the previous blog, our preteen ministry is going to take an approach of simplification. I like how Luke (the person who left a comment on the previous blog) used the word burden to describe the business that we strap to the backs of the people that we minister too. In a sense, a lot of our programs do become burdens to our people, because many times we make them feel guilty for choosing other functions over ours or they themselves feel guilty for not doing enough for God (There are many other reasons as well). Through all the business, people have a hard time of seeing a clear picture of the character of God and experiencing the glory of who He is and what he means to them! Can we bask in His glory, when we are busy doing?

I must state here, that I am not against programming, because programming helps us meet the felt needs of people (See Acts chapter 6). What I am saying, is that our programming needs to be more than just purposeful, it needs to be narrow focused and strategic. Simplification does not mean “dumbing down”, it means to move away from doing a lot of things good or even really good, to doing a few things really well and with excellence.

What are you doing in your churches and other organizations to take the burdens of the backs of God’s people, so they can bask in the Glory of God? (Part three, I will elaborate on what we are doing for our preteen ministry)

Joe

PART 1 Why are families so busy these days? Why i…

PART 1

Why are families so busy these days? Why is it that we, the church, feel the need to create more programming, more events, and more business for our families? Do we think we can compete with world for the thing that is most precious to our families, and that being their time? The world is ready and already has invested everything it has to keep our people occupied and distracted. The world does things very well and with excellence, and they can because they take a “sky’s the limit” approach.

Does this mean that the world is better than the church? No way! It means that the world knows the stakes are high and they are willing to do whatever it takes, in order to keep people away from from what matters most! And that is to seek God and love Him with all our heart, with all our soul, with all our mind, and with all our strength. And to love our neighbor as yourself!

What should we, the church do about this?

Joe

Let me tell you about the church I minister at and…

Let me tell you about the church I minister at and it’s leadership – They are the best group of men that I have ever served under. Their foresight and insight is something to be admired. They are not afraid to take the jump when necesary, in order bring about change, but at the same time, they are men of prayer and caution! They are not satified with the “status quo,” they want no stagnation; instead they want to honor God in all that they do and sometimes that means we stop doing what we are well, in order to do something new with excellence.

I say all this, because it was two years ago that they decided to invest time, energy, and resources to start a ministry to preteens (Actually, they started this a little before this time, but I came on two years ago as paid staff). They saw the need to ministry to preteens outside the traditional realm of Children’s Ministry and they took the jump. If you haven’t taken the jump to minister to preteens outside the traditional realm of Children’s Ministry, then you need too! Contact me if you don’t know where to start.

Keep it real in Christ,
Joe

You ever go to a ministry training conference in a…

You ever go to a ministry training conference in another city and fall in love with that city – well I did. The city was Atlanta, Georgia (Alpharetta to be exact). Alpharette reminded me of home (San Fransico Bay Area, CA) . Not because the cities were exactly alike, Alpharetta isn’t even near the ocean. No! It was the similarities that I felt in the atmosphere, the buzz, Starbucks being real close and the malls had a Gap store and more importantly, an Apple store. Similarities bring us comfort when we are in a new city, new house, new school, and new areas of ministry. For many preteens, leaving the Children’s ministry that they have known for over four years or even for some, since they were a baby, can be exciting, but also very overwhelming. That is why those of us who minister to preteens, need to provide an atmosphere that is not only new and exciting, but also with some similarities from the old area of ministry they just came out of. We need to do this, so that we can help them make the transition from kiddieland to the world of preteens, and close the gap that so many of them fall into and never return!

Joe

"Something old and something new" – have you ever …

“Something old and something new” – have you ever really thought about this saying, especially when it is directed toward your children, both your own kids and the kids you minister too? I have and just recently! My oldest daughter (soon to be 13) will be leaving my preteen ministry and entering into the Jr. High ministry at our church. She has been a part of my ministry for two years and is the first of my own kids to be in an area of ministry that I was over. I remember when she was a young girl of about 5 or 6 and my youth group (From a previous church ministry) would love on her and spoil her with all the attention that a youth minister’s daughter gets. She has just started to voice her feelings that she is ready to get out of our preteen ministry, it seems that it is becoming old news to her. Now, she is moving on and entering a new phase of her walk with Jesus. Her new journey! She is exiting her preteen years better than I ever did.

My son on the other hand will turn 10 in a few weeks and there is something new on the horizon for him, he will be entering into my area of ministry at our church. he is excited about the new journey before him. He is entering into his preteen years better than I ever did.

Huh, “Something old and something new!”

Joe